For parents who want to build a better emotional connection with their children or teenagers, Raising a Secure Child is a great manual filled with tips, techniques, anecdotes and stories about how to do so. The author, Dr. Zeynep Biringen, is the developer of the widely used Emotional Availability Scales, and shows how the level of parental availability to children can make or break the relationship.
Using the principles of emotional availability, along with plenty of exercises and examples of how to put these principles to use, Dr. Biringen teaches parents to identify strategies of connection that work with their children, assess the strong points and weak points of their relationships and work on both, deal with behavioral problems in different age groups, and build an emotional safety net for children to serve as a powerful and effective foundation for future success.
According to this information-packed book, just “being there” for a child is not enough, it is really more about the quality of your attentiveness and the state of your own emotions that allows for true connection. Parents of foster, adopted and disabled children can also find helpful information about their special circumstances in this comprehensive guide to relationship.
The book covers the Eight Principles of Emotional Availability, the two sides of emotional connection, the impact of your own childhood on your child (you may be harboring more childhood baggage than you think!), ways to keep the connection strong even during stressful times, and supporting your child through their school years, divorce, remarriage or a major crisis, when the bonds of deep connection can often become fragile.
For parents eager to learn more, the author provides a very detailed reference section filled with books that further explore the topics discussed, and there is even a website for the author,
www.emotionalavailability.com, for more details on creating a strong and secure child.
As a parent, I can truly say that nothing is more important to me than my connection with my child, and I am eager to try out whatever I can to do a better job. Raising a Secure Child is packed solid with advice and strategies that can help make the parent/child bond a strong one in a way that benefits both parties. I strongly recommend it for any parent who is willing to learn, and to do the often hard work that comes with raising a child into a fully functioning, happy human being.