Police procedural meets wacky characters in the newest book by Valerie Block, author of Was It Something I Said? None of Your Business is the story of Erica King, a brilliant, no-nonsense, hairless accountant who can’t understand why everyone in Manhattan can’t leave her alone to go about her lonely life in peace. Without encouragement, nearly everyone she meets seems to want to tell her about their failed relationships, their bad hair day or the color of their baby’s poop. That’s why Erica is thrilled when her boss, wealthy Mitch Grieff, enjoys her no-frills personality and is attracted to her strange, frumpy looks. She’s so thrilled that she decides to let him in on her secret world—a world of identity theft, hidden money in off-shore banks and a variety of different wigged looks.
Mitch Grieff should be happy with his swanky apartment, ex-model wife and celebrity client list. But Mitch is annoyed with his work, sick of his wife, and ready to get out of his life altogether. That’s why mysterious Erica King is so appealing to him. When they become involved and she presents an idea of how they can both start over, he jumps at the chance, even though it means leaving everything in his old life behind.
Detectives Sprague and Bellestrino are on the case of Grieff and the missing millions he has apparently stolen from many of his high-profile clients. Sprague is on his third marriage and only able to fit into one pair of his current pants. Bellestrino still lives with his mother and can’t understand why getting full background checks on his dates seems to turn them off. As they begin to follow Grieff’s trail, they become suspicious of the boring, unattractive Erica and guess that she may have something to do with Mitch and his crime.
None of Your Business combines detective work with neurosis to mixed results. While the police work is believable and interesting, the crazy characters are a bit too crazy and neurotic to be likeable, making it difficult to find even one of them to root for. Although Mitch’s wife is decent enough, we could use at least one more nice, normal character added to the mix to make it more enjoyable. As it stands, None of Your Business is an entertaining story with plenty of characters who will make you feel nice and normal.